Working through this depression I have found home to not always be the best place to be, especially on a day when I am down and we have nothing planned. And so a few weeks ago, I was determined to get us out of the house and ride the metro Downtown and have some fun there. The MetroRail runs all day now, so much easier to do.

But first, we pause for a picture Quinn wanted me to take:

And so off it was to ride the Metro. I must say, the trains are gorgeous! The ride was smooth and really lovely. We parked at Highland Mall for this trip. Unfortunately, there is really no official urban parking.

And so we arrive in Downtown. We walked from the station to Congress and headed to the Austin Museum of Art. Tyler commented about Downtown always being busy with hustle and bustle. Yes, it is. And it is fun to be in the middle of it.

The museum was great featuring 15 new artists to watch from in and around the Austin area. It featured so many different styles: performance art, video art, sculpture, photography, drawing, mixed media, and so much more. I love how it illustrates the diversity of mediums. There are so many ways to express ones self and I love my kids being able to see that.

In the kids area, there was a place where the kids could use stencils to make patterns or just do a drawing of their own. So of course, we left our mark!

After that, we moseyed into a souvenir shop on Congress. That was fun. It is always interesting as a native Texan to see what they are peddling to those that visit our state. After that we headed to the Hideout to have a snack. That place has so much eye candy. I really enjoyed the art that was hung there and the ambiance in general. I got some delicious chai tea and the kids enjoyed some ice cream. After that it was back home.

I love Downtown and I loved riding the metro. It was the perfect thing to do on this particular Thursday. I just love being out in the world and thankfully so do the kids.

This was Wednesday. It started with a beautiful golden sunrise. I had to capture the joy it brought me. Then it was off to the appointment, the wake up call. Um, yeah, you are not okay.

From there was scheduling an appointment for medicinal support because it was now clear I needed it. Then came this article. The mirror was held up to my face and I finally got it. This was something significant and now out of my control. This happens to other people and that I was not crazy nor was I a failure. I was 1 in 5 people who would go through a really difficult and dark time in their lives.





Creating with Quinn

I was in such a funk after that. And because I know I am in this place, I try extra hard to be present with the kids. And so this afternoon, Quinn was cutting out hearts she had just painted.

She was giving them to me to, “put them in the kitchen Mama so when you see them you smile.” And so I looked at them and thought about hanging them. Then I saw there were 4 hearts and thought “mobile!”

We had no straws, but then I thought “sticks!” – even better! To be fair, once I tied the first heart on the stick, Quinn was very happy with her “heart whacking stick”. I had to pause the project because it seemed we were on the creative outs. She liked what she had and off she went happily.

Later she was done playing with it and allowed to me move forward with the mobile. It made me so happy to do something simple and creative with her art. It came out so well. I hung it in the kitchen as she had originally instructed. It makes me smile.

Four hearts. Four of us. In this life, each on our own journey, but sharing the road together. Of course, she later told me she liked the “heart whacking sticks” better. My very honest four year-old.

Lady Gaga!!

Later that night, I was headed to see Lady Gaga!!! I know – talk about a day of highs and lows…. It was a crazy thing. I had expressed via Facebook that I was way bummed I wasn’t going. I had this notion I was too old to go, but realized that was crap. I need to spend more time being true to myself. Anyway, another friend concurred and we agreed we would see her next time around. Well the very next day, someone she knew was selling two tickets. Talk about being meant to be!!

How often does a person get a “do-over” on a regret? and in such a big way!?!?! Naturally I put on a wig, some fun make up and expressed myself. Madonna would be damn proud! Speaking of regrets – never saw her live…

The concert was truly amazing. Whatever you think of Lady Gaga, you cannot deny that she is talented. Her voice is incredible. In addition to rocking the piano, she played organ, stand up base and that guitar/keyboard instrument I can’t name (:-p). She’s a fantastic performer and really gives her all. It’s a complete show – sets, costumes, performance art, interaction with the audience. It was really a great experience – and to feel that much energy in an arena is so cool.

The best moment though was her piano rendition of “Born this Way”. Everytime I listen to this I get chills. It really is a beautiful song and sung this way is so very powerful. And to hear thousands of people sing the chorus – well, that is a moment that will elevate you. Simply spine tingling. And given this crazy-making place in which I find myself – the words below mean a great deal. An affirmation if you will. The video I took is below – you must watch and listen to it – I promise you’ll get chills too.

“There’s nothin wrong with lovin who you are”
She said, “’cause he made you perfect, babe”
“So hold your head up girl and you’ll go far,
Listen to me when I say”

I’m beautiful in my way
‘Cause God makes no mistakes
I’m on the right track baby
I was born this way
Don’t hide yourself in regret
Just love yourself and you’re set
I’m on the right track baby
I was born this way

And if you got this far – just for fun, here is a panorama of the arena.

Quinn took a few photos while we were bowling last weekend. Have I mentioned just how much the kids love to bowl? Tyler beat all of us scoring 2 games over 100! There is a great deal at our neighborhood bowling alley on Sundays – $7 for 2.5 hours of unlimited bowling and it includes shoes. That is $28 for 2.5 hours of fun – great deal for a family of four!

This time Grandma Havel joined us. When I was a kid, my parents had their own bowling balls and were in a league. So it was good to get her our bowling again.

I also have to post these two shots I took this day. One of a cool design Tyler make with buttons and another of the the kids with their treasure bags filled with coins ready to go and spend it.

Twice a year the Texas Memorial Museum on the UT Campus hosts Identification Day. On this day, archeologists, geologists and paleontologists in the area are on hand to help folks identify items they have collected.

Tyler was very excited about figuring out what some of his fossils were. First though, the day began with some art and family game time. Chris just got the kids a new game called Kids of Carcassonne. Awesome tile laying game – the kids love to play and so do we!

Identification Day!
We headed off to the museum, each kid with their rocks and fossils in tow. It was really fascinating to watch the process of identification. This woman was great with the kids and Tyler in particular. She helped him ID a possum jaw that he had found and also pointed out scratches in other meat bones he had found where small animals were eating off the bone to get their minerals.

I love watching Tyler learn. He came with specific questions. And he wanted that nugget of knowledge. Those would get answered, but more information would come to him. He might look away, but he was listening. He wouldn’t respond much, but all those bits and pieces had gone in and were floating around. After we left, he would slowly integrate all that information and it would come out days later when he was explaining what he had learned another child.

As I move more into a teacher role, I have to remember that. It is all going in even if he doesn’t seem to be paying attention. He needs time and space to integrate it all.

We then went to the archeology table to identify a few articats Tyler had found. I think he is slowly leaning towards this specialty. He is wanting to go on an actual dig badly! Quinn was not an idle participant either. She wanted to know whey there was in a break in one of her rocks, so we asked and she got her answer!

After we were done, we explored other parts of the musem

We headed down to the prehistoric area where all the dinosaur fossils are. In the “lab” area, there was student looking for microfossils in cave sediment. Tyler was fascinated. He could see what the student was looking at through the microscope via a large flat panel screen.

Tyler was enjoying helping the student find some bones. The student got some fossils out for Tyler to identity which was fun. Tyler loved it. He now wants a microscope and the other day was searching through sand using a magnifying glass and tweezers to search for “micro-fossils”.

It is cool to see him to see him so fascinating and drinking in all these experiences and how he integrates what he experiences.

A few weekends back, we had lunch with Chris parent’s at an awesome tea house/ restaurant called Koriente. It is downtown and I would highly recommend it. Amazing food and decor. We hung out for about 3 hours we were so thoroughly enjoying ourselves!

from October 24, 2010

Chris grew up going to these in Ohio and so we have brought this tradition into our family for the kids.

Tyler then got a hold of my camera and captured some memories for himself!

To create harmony, I gave Quinn my camera. I have done this before and they have shot pictures, but this is the first time that she has literally held down the button to take a picture. We came home with 180 shots. In fact, when placed quickly you could see the road going by, the cars…it was funny. So I did just that. Created a quick movie. It is uneventful, not very exciting – just what a drive home should be.

The opening slide says, “The ride home from Bastrop – from Quinn’s viewpoint”. Enjoy!

YouTube link (faster and easier to watch):

Click on the image below to view my copy – only do this if the YouTube one is unavailable because it will load much more slowly.