Well, today we did more sawing practice with Tyler and today I remembered to get an action shot. I loved that after he was done he instinctively went for the sandpaper to smooth out the cut.

This afternoon I also thought they might enjoy sewing some buttons. Grandma Suzie had brought a huge bunch of buttons over for them, so I had them pick some out. Quinn is still working with burlap and tapestry needles where Tyler has moved onto muslin/linen and real needles. I would love to say that he has done all this at home, but the credit goes to his amazing teacher, Denice, at his school. Tyler started on burlap just sewing stitches and then made a pillow. He now is embroidering a race car. It is so cool to pick him up and find him around the table all sewing and working in their projects!

The kids really enjoyed working on the buttons! I think we will try another afternoon of adding more and then eventually, I wanted to add some embroidery to it…at least for Tyler. We will see where this project goes!

I KNOW in my head that everything is weather and that it all passes, but I am just now getting to where I can understand that fact in the middle of a thunderstorm. I have to celebrate the moments where I stay present and don’t run away. Where I meet the challenge head-on and do not loose my cool too much in the process. I don’t know if you call that growth or simply a good day. Nevertheless, I have to capture the details to remind me that these mature reactions are possible even when I am not 100%…..

Remembering to lean on my rhythms – that is what they are there for
Today was just hard – I was tired and anxious this morning and I don’t know why. I guess it is how hubby feels heading to work – your whole being does not want to go, but there is no choice. Thankfully, last weekend I decided that it was time for be to get back to our rhythms. And so even though the kids were a bit crazy, we ate, got dressed, did our circle and then walked the dog. And it was really cute when I sang our calling song that Tyler said, “I have 2 more jewels to put away, don’t start circle without me.” I am more used to him not wanting to come or giving me a hard time, so I really appreciated his enthusiasm. And getting outside in the morning even for 10 minutes is so nice.

Talking to myself and being my own best friend
And so it was time for them to play and I needed to get the house in some order before going to get my Dad. I had an hour. Of course, within a few minutes, I moved a cookie sheet, knocking over and breaking two wine glasses. And then when I go to throw away the broken glass the trash is full. At first I was mad at hubby – why doesn’t he ever empty it! But I reminded myself that I had many times over the last few days noted it needed to be emptied – we both neglected it. There was no blame it just was.

And man, it was so full, that lifting it out would tear the bag. And so I decided to flip it over into another trash bag. And in doing that I end up with disgusting trash juice all over me..and all over the floor. I tried a 3rd bag – it tore and so I just carried the whole thing to the garage trash can. *sigh*

And so then I am starting to blame myself for this catastrophe, but I stopped that too – I didn’t do anything wrong – it was a string of bad luck – “just move forward a task at a time and watch out for glass lady!” And so I did.

Of course the kids are being quite noisy and I just want to yell and say “Be quiet!” (or perhaps a stronger phrase), but I didn’t. I go check on them – they are playing fine and simply adding a boisterous soundtrack. No wildness, no throwing things, so I decide to let it go, breathe and deal with the noise.

And so with 25 minutes to go, I got the nasty juice wiped up, did my best to get as many dishes done as I could and wipe up the counters. It wasn’t everything, but it was a good start and I was proud for that and for keeping a good eye on the clock.

We had to pick up my Dad at his center in Cedar Park and get to Georgetown at 11am for a lunch with his Alzheimer home peeps. My Mom was out of town, so she asked up to take him. That would also allow to center to bring another resident. I needed to leave our house at 10.

Natural Consequences
I really admire the Eclectic Mom’s blog. I like how she strives for respect in her parenting as well as natural consequences. And so it was today when the kids were outside playing with water. We had to leave in 5 minutes and so I told them – I had to go get cleaned up (nasty trash juice..ick!) and if they wanted to go see Pop in dry clothes they needed to go get changed. And so Quinn found me and brought fresh clothes that I helped her get into. Tyler did not. And when we left he said, “I want to go in wet clothes today.” And I said okay and we left. It all worked out and was less nagging on my part. And I really liked the idea that it isn’t my job to always think of everything for them. I can give them a reminder or two, but after that, it is up to them to act if it is important to them. And if they decide not too, they deal with consequences of that. It is good for them AND for me..someone who is a natural “let me do it all for you” kind of person.

And so it goes…
And so it goes, we were on the road at 10:05am – sweet! And a great song – Oasis, “Wonderwall” comes on the radio. And I enjoy the memories that flood back to me and the sunshine the song brings. And so I enjoy the warmth and the goodness of the moment. More weather is sure to come…but it will come, do its thing and pass. My job is to work harder to be the observer, to acknowledge the weather, but not to let it drive my reaction.

The restaurant went pretty good all things considered – I essentially had three kids in line at a buffet, but we eventually all got our food and enjoyed sitting down with all the folks and sharing a meal.

I am quite pooped now, but at least Quinn is napping. And so we head into the afternoon where I hope to keep the kids quite busy so they will be ready for bed. Off to make coffee…which I am drinking way more often then I should. But hey – it is cheaper to make at home, right?

Had a great time painting with my best friend tonight whom I hadn’t seen in a while. It was quite lovely. And now after I have had such a lovely time with friends, I will do what most extroverts don’t do – have some time alone. *gasp* That is how I different from 10 years ago – now I also need time by myself to recharge, regroup and get caught up on life (er, email).

But I am slowly figuring out how to balance all the heaviness. I am also trying to be with people without dumping on them which is hard because I wear my heart on my sleeve and just share at will. Thankfully, by spending time with people who know me and “get me”, I don’t feel as self-conscious about it, but still, I try to be considerate with my energy and intensity.

Another hard day for hubby…never fun, but kind of what we are stuck with for the time being and so ya know, muddle through I guess. My friend and I were talking about all the exciting things on the horizon for fall and I really hope that the cooler weather brings a much needed shift for everyone. We are all so ready…

And now it is near midnight – not the best bedtime for me, especially as I am taking care of my Dad tomorrow and driving he and the kids to Georgetown. It will be fine I am sure. I may decide to lose some sleep and do a yoga workout tomorrow morning, my body is begging for it.

Well, rambling and so with that, I head to bed!

I could seriously post a picture like this everyday. It is all at once amazing and enough to drive me to wine every night at 6pm. I forgot what they were doing here…I think they were making some kind of soup? All I know is it had to do with pouring the water (if it was water – don’t know what it was for them) into the toilet paper rolls..and the blue paper had a role too, but I forgot its purpose..

My kids make me feel so uncreative…..the things they come up with!

So this Sunday we bought Tyler a saw. Oh he was quite excited. My friend lent me the coolest woodworking book and I am diving in. Tyler is SO ready for more. And so we are diving into as much as we can – woodworking, sewing, finger knitting, beeswax, crafts – as much as he is wanting. This woodworking book really focusing on teaching the kids the fundamentals so they can create themselves. There are also a ton of great projects that are easy, but very satisfying for the kids.

Sawing is hard work! But Tyler stuck with it and made his first cut. He then sanded the edge. He told me after he finished that he was “happy and proud”! He has been showing it to everyone and making sure they notice that he also sanded the edge. I plan to do more saw practice tomorrow.

It takes a lot to prepare for some of this stuff, but I must say, it is so worth it! And it is so cool to see how proud he is of himself. Luckily some of this I will be able to do with both of them. This particular skill though was too much for Quinn, so she worked on a sanding project while Tyler learned to saw.

so again, I said I was drunk – I guess I am coming down now..

But still, I have to just wonder in amazement at the universe. It brings you just what you need when you need it….and at this time it has been people..and providing me opportunities to get together with people in person. Lately, email just doesn’t do it. I want in person interaction – I find it way more powerful and fulfilling than email. That is just me – I want real hugs!!

I have been so happy to discover and deepen friendships that have been in front of me for so long. To get to know and further appreciate the amazing people that are around me. And in the heavy times we are in, it is the friends who get you through it.

It is treating a Monday like a Friday, saying to hell with it and just enjoying an evening and letting the day take us where it may. Irresponsible? Maybe. But I am learning more and more to seize the day and these opportunities that don’t come around all that often with kids.

Friday night was a lifesaver, this evening was so blissful, and Tuesday brings plans and an opportunity to connect with a dear friend. So tonight I head to bed feeling so lucky and thankful for the dear people in my life and the love, warmth and kindness they share with me.

I am going to caveat this entire post by noting that I am intoxicated. I imagine I will post this, attempt to pick up the house a bit more and then pass out. It is Monday and so that all feels a bit wrong, but then again it is Chris’s late night and he won’t be home until midnight and how can I say no to a lovely evening with good friends? When life is so crazy right now – I say yes to anything that involves good friends.

I love the universe first and foremost for giving me just what I need right when I need it. Last Friday I was a mess and I got lucky – one of my friends was able to get away and get out with me. To chat with someone in person for a few hours was so incredibly wonderful and completely shifted my mood. And this dear friend with her quiet strength and power of observation said something that really made an impact on me. She commented that we should enjoy this time when our kids are mystified by the simplest of things – buttons, hair clips, whatever is around. She said some day, they will just be so bored no longer this fascinated in the same way.

I heart the camera
I took those thoughts to heart. My kids make enormous messes, but they are playing in the most incredible ways. But this day I took my camera to capture it all. It is amazing how helpful that is – behind the lens I become an observer. No longer the Mom that will surely have to clean up some part of the grand mess that is coming (and it did when Tyler dumped a huge bit of muddy water all over the floor), but a fly on the wall enjoying the play and creativity that is underfoot. They think not of consequences, not of the mess or clean-up that will eventually be required, but focus all their energy on the story, the play – using everything at their disposal to make the tools and props that they need.

I sometimes wish we still lived in simple one-bedroom houses or tepees, because, really, they suit kids better. They don’t need to worry about fancy furnishings getting soiled or floors getting scratched – they just play. Here are some images I captured that day – I enjoyed sitting behind the camera and just shooting all the goodness that was around me….