The kids were completely crazed one weekend day. Chris and I were so tired. It was clear to me they needed to burn off some steam, so out in the 100 degree heat we headed. The kids ran around the front yard like banshees for at least 30 minutes. And then FINALLY, finally they settle. And the next thing I know they are chatting about camping. Tyler runs inside for something and comes back out with a pot, scissors and cups. And the kids set to work collecting “firewood” and gathering their ingredients for their Mother Earth stew. All the frustration I had pent up from the day slowly melts away as I watch these two in complete wonderment.

Why? Because it is calm there. Everything is still there while life whirls crazily around me. Life is good, but busy and so much is going on.

On one hand, there is everyone else’s life going on.

- My Dad is going into an Alzheimers Home this week. Yes, he is 60 and being put in a home. It is a sad disease he has and has convinced me that I will terminate my life when the right time comes if I am diagnosed with any kind of brain degeneration. Oddly enough, my Mom and I are having caregiver guilt at the same time as I am putting my kids in a program 2 days a week and she is putting my Dad in.

- I had a friend who thought she might have an aneurysm. Those freak me out as I saw two friends go through that with their Moms. One friend’s Mom died on the way to the ER when my friend was 7 yrs old. I went to the funeral, we were in second grade together. The whole thing left a huge impression on me. Another friend was in college when her Mom had one and survived, but had to have her frontal lobe removed. Her Mom would be 8 yrs old for the rest of her life and my friend would become her caregiver. The good news is that today we found out she is fine! She didn’t post what was causing those terrible headaches, but I hope that they find out.

- I am entering that time in my life where marriages are starting to deteriorate. That is a new phase for me. It is so sad, but as I am learning, each situation is so completely different. Some I could see coming and some I couldn’t. One of the crappier sides to life. In the end I hope everyone ends up happy. I have seen people divorce and their lives end up in way better places than they could ever imagine. That is what I hope for my friends.

Oh, and in talking to Chris about his job today, Tyler says, “that’s just life.” to something I said. I promptly told him he was too young to say that. Anyway, it is weird to be an observer sometimes - there isn’t anything i can do, but support where appropriate.

Then there is my life about to go on…

I say about because nothing starts in earnest for another two weeks. And so I can feel myself just waiting. Waiting for the shift, waiting for the wave to carry me. Waiting for the time.

1. Kids start school. That will be a really nice break. I plan to spend most of my time exercising, working on house projects that need to get finished, and planning stuff for the kids. I will have my one small job, but I would love another way to earn some money. Not that I have time, but who needs time? I realize that the cost of putting the kids in school goes way beyond the tuition because I will have more time and that will cost money - yoga classes, a meal out with a friend here and there, supplies for projects. It is actually cost effective to have the kids at home because things get done so slowly, you spend your money slowly! :-p

2. Monday Morning Co-op Starts. It will initially be for just 2/2.5 hours in September, but in October we will extend it to a full day from about 9:30 to 3pm. Although it will be a bit much with the kids in school, it will really help me dip my toes into the homeschooling waters and see what I think. I have started examining my many ideas and emotions around schooling for the kids. I want to really understand the reason for my choices and make sure it is best for the kids and for our family. The co-op will be parent/child based, at my house and based on Enki Education. If we do homeschool, this will be our base community.

3. BFC Office Manager Job - Our director is back from vacation, so my job will begin in earnest now. I am really looking forward to it. Fall registration will be starting soon, so I will be busy with that and a whole host of other things. It is neat to help grow a business and begin to formalize processes and operations.

Waiting for the season to shift

I feel it most when it comes to my cooking. I have had the best time cooking this summer. I have enjoyed the summer veggies and all the new, exciting recipes. Suddenly, that excitement has waned and I feel so unmotivated. And I realized that I am ready for the next harvest. I am in line with the earth, because the CSA just emailed that we are at the end of our summer harvest and that things will be lean for the month of August. I have been ordering some from the Soup Peddler and just trying to keep the meals simple around here. Chris and I love fall, so we are just waiting, waiting, waiting.

Surviving the Summer

I think Chris and I have done a good job getting through the summer. Kayaking has been really helpful and a wonderful discovery for our family. Also spontaneity has been crucial.

The other night we were going to do a repeat of our sunset kayak trip. We left the house late and I just felt that Chris and I didn’t have it in us. So we went to Jo’s Downtown and got lattes, then parked at Auditorium Shores. We started walking towards Congress Bridge and thought about maybe seeing if we could catch the bats. Sure enough we waited for about 20 minutes and then got to see them. The kids thought they were about 5 minutes of cool. Chris has never seen them come out from so close and from that perspective (we were under the bridge). And of course, dusk in the city is so damn cool. I wanted to stash the kids and go get a drink with Chris at the Hyatt.

This past weekend we took the kids to the Children’s Museum. I didn’t realize that Chris had never been, so Daddy had a great time playing with the kids.

Also with the kids starting school, we have been getting Grandparents to take the kids on the weekends. Chris and I have been having all these fun dates - we went Kayaking together on Town Lake, had coffee with friends and just this weekend saw the Dark Knight at the IMAX theater with friends. It has been really nice to spend time together as a couple.

That is where I am in a nutshell. I have so many other things I want to post about, but I have some other to-do’s that require my attention…

W-O-W! Oh my god dinner was nothing short of gourmet, amazing, and relatively easy. Thanks to Frugal Foods for this awesome idea and of course to How to Cook Everything Vegetarian cookbook which I love more and more everyday!

Tonight’s dinner started off with a simple salad - lettuce, red onion, toasted pecans, and fresh parmasean cheese. I made a homemade balsamic dressing to go with it. Best part is, I made a huge bowl of this salad yesterday banking on the leftovers tonight. So the salad was ready to go.

Follow that with crepes filled with caramelized onions and fresh, locally-made mozzarella cheese and beer-braised black beans. I made the crepe batter and onions during naptime and the beans only take 20 minutes to put together, so really the only tedious part is the making of each crepe.

I had bought a big bottle of Newcastle to go in the beans. There was plenty of it leftover for hubby and I to have some with dinner. Man, I am starting to like beer…it was so tasty. It was nice to welcome hubby home and hand him a beer in a fancy-shmancy bar beer glass (not the mugs, but the tall glasses). He asked where I got the beer from and I said, “beer came with dinner!” :-p

Gotta run - life has been busy as you can tell from my lack of posting. I always have a long list of blog posts in my head, it is just a matter of getting to them. Oh, and sorry there is no pic of aforementioned dinner - it looked so good, I wanted to dive right in and totally forgot to photograph it.

Ooops - just heard a hard bonk in the next room and here comes toddler with ouchie….

It is bad folks - I headed to my favorite house of sin Saturday - that is right- Hill Country Weavers and picked up yarn for another three hats. I started a hat Saturday night and had it finished Monday morning. I just can’t stop. Actually, I am getting better at putting it down.

But just today I was telling a friend how I LOVE the decrease sequence of a hat. It is like hiking - you go up and up and up for the view at the top. The decrease sequence is where all the shaping happens - it is just so fun. And don’t interrupt me when I am “in sequence” - it requires focus and I don’t want to stop until I have finished.

My name is A. Hedge and I have a problem - I should just start practicing…

I have much to share and no time - isn’t that always the case. The kids have their first visit to their school tomorrow morning. Chris is going with us and we will see how it goes. My boss gets back from her vacation in two weeks, so I need to make sure am I ready for the fall registration period as it will get hectic.

Then there is this binder in which I pretty much organized my life with color coded sheets of paper. Said binder got left at the house of sin, er.. knitting store, and now cannot be found. Three hours of work - the mourning continues, but the knitting eases the pain…

And at some point, I have to sit down and get into details about my kids - fascinating beings these two. And if I don’t get their nuances and idiosyncrasies documented,  they will be lost forever. Lord, knows I can’t remember either of them a year ago. Ask me if they were like this a year ago and I would tell you, ” I have no clue, check the blog…..”

I need to head to bed, but just wanted to check in. I also need to tell you about our new favorite recreational activity - kayaking. Chris and i were actually on the lake twice this weekend - we were sore as hell, but man it was so fun!!

Gotta get to bed!

Kayaking on LadyBird Lake at sunset with hubby and the kids.

No one on my shoulder bringing me fears Got no clouds up above me bringing me tears Got nothing to tell you I got nothing much to say Only I’m glad to be here with you On this heavenly heavenly heavenly heavenly heavenly day - Patty Griffin

The kids decided to create together. I think they both worked on the black drawing. Don’t know what was up with all the black that day. At one point i remember Tyler asking Quinn “is that how you feel, Quinn?” Don’t know - maybe it was a brief gothic or beatnik phase. They started this themselves and had a good time doing some drawing.

Quinn also drew everywhere on the wooden floors with said black marker. Thankfully it was all washable. She went nuts - I found more of it today that I had missed yesterday.

Last week, Daddy was gone for 2.5 days on a business trip. I had purchased this neat “While I am Away” box and corresponding, “I am Always With You” wallet from a friend who sells Once Upon a Lifetime products. The products had come in, so I decided the afternoon before Chris left to get them and do some fun stuff for Daddy.

I told Tyler that we were going to get Daddy something for the plane. Tyler wanted to go get Daddy, “A CD of the national.” “I was thinking more along the lines of a book, Tyler. Why a CD Tyler?” “Because Daddy likes CDs; he likes songs.”

I couldn’t argue with that - he knew is Daddy. I didn’t really want to explain to Tyler that Daddy uses mp3’s - and for the last few weeks he had been ripping many of our CDs for his iPod and that CDs are kind of passe and that Chris already had all the National songs. So we went to the bookstore and came home with a book and a CD of the national.

We also went and had some recent photos printed. Then the kids each drew a drawing for their Daddy and I asked them what they wanted to say to their Daddy and wrote those words down. The wallet was meant to be a surprise, but when a toddler has knowledge of a surprise, well, it rarely remains as such. Daddy was quite pleased.

I had mentioned the box to Chris and said he may want to leave a note for the kids or something. I had meant to remind him that night, but had forgotten and assumed he had too. He hadn’t. While he was watching the Tour, he drew the sweetest drawing for the kids and wrote notes to all of us on the back. He also got our USA map and put markers on it for where we lives, where Daddy was going and all the places that Tyler knew - The Guads, Steamboat and Arkansas (we are vacationing there this fall ,so he talks about it a lot).

Tyler loved it! He would ask “Where is Daddy’s box?”, carry it to a spot of the floor, sit down and study the drawing. He also enjoyed checking out the map (he is so much like his mama).